Escaping Memories Read online

"Please..."

  "No, honey. You can't beg your way out of it today. What are you afraid of?"

  "I don't know."

  "Are you sure? Don't be afraid to tell me. Are you afraid of telling me something?"

  "No. I feel safe with you. I don't know, Logan. I just don't know," she said, hanging her head down, trying desperately now to hold in the tears.

  With his other hand, not wanting to let go of her hand, he raised her head to meet his eyes. "Please don't cry. I will take care of you. Until we figure this out, you have nothing to worry about. I won't let anyone hurt you, I swear. Do you trust me?"

  She nodded. "I do."

  "Good. Now I'm going to go make some calls. I won't leave the cabin. I promise."

  Reluctantly, because the more he touched her, the more he never wanted to let her go, he removed his hand from her face. He hesitated a brief second before letting her hand slip out of his as well. He stood up, pulled his phone from his belt, and called Derek as he walked to the kitchen. He started to pick up the mess from breakfast as he briefly informed Derek of what transpired last night. He left out some details Derek didn't need to know. Like the fact, he held her naked in his arms right before he settled her in the bath and proceeded to wash her body. Or that he soothed her back to sleep after the horrible nightmare, and continued to hold her throughout the night as she slept—and enjoyed it.

  Next, he called his sister, Kat, to come over. He explained just as much as he did to Derek, told her he needed her to stay with his mystery woman while they did a little tracking. When he finished both calls, he glanced over the couch to see her staring at him, the fear still registering in her eyes.

  "Who's Kat?" she asked as he walked back over to her, kneeling down by her side. "And what did you mean by tracking?"

  "She's my sister. You'll like her. She's also a nurse. I would like it if you let her take a look at you. I'm no...you know...and I want to make sure there's no need to take you to...you know."

  She smiled at his willingness not to say the words that always put her in a panic. Strangely, even as she knew what he was talking about, it did make her feel better not hearing the words, doctor or hospital. "But I'm fine. Just sore."

  "Your feet worry me. And those bruises on your stomach worry me. And your memory loss worries me. I shouldn't say that, but I'm just being honest. Just let her take a look," he replied, the pleading clear in his eyes.

  "What did tracking mean?"

  "Dodging me again, I see." He shook his head at her refusal to agree with him. "Kat's going to stay with you while Derek and I go tracking through the woods. I want to try to see where you came from. Do you remember what direction you came from when you spotted my cabin?"

  "Don't leave me, Logan! Oh, please, don't do that," she exclaimed, grabbing his hand that rested lightly on the cushion.

  He felt her terror of the notion of him leaving as she squeezed his hand in pain. She had a very strong grip for a woman who looked so weak.

  "Honey, it's okay. I promise. My sister—"

  "No! Logan, please."

  "Calm down, please. Listen to me," he said, reaching over to cradle her cheek, rubbing a soft thumb where a tear ran down. "I have to for just a little while. I need to find some answers. You'll like Kat. She's my sister. If you trust me, you can trust her. I promise. Let me help. You know my need to help. I have to do this. And I'm the sheriff, it's my job."

  She closed her eyes as a feeling of safety swamped her senses. His hand caressing her cheek made the tingles he always invoked swarm to an electrifying sensation. She just loved it when he cradled her cheek.

  "Sweetheart, please. Don't shut me out like this. I need you to agree with me and tell me what you remember."

  She popped her eyes open, immediately seeing the pain in his eyes. "You won't be gone long?"

  "I'll try not to be."

  She stared at him for a while, the terror still present. She could feel the shakes engulf her body. She knew he could feel it as well. He calmed her with his touch, but the thought of him leaving her sight was too much to bear.

  "I don't remember what way I came from," she finally said in response.

  "Did you immediately walk right up to the steps, or did you have to circle the building first? Take your time. Close your eyes if you have to. But just try and think for me."

  He started to lower his hand from her face when she grabbed it, pressing it back to her cheek, and closed her eyes. He watched her as she kept her eyes closed for a few minutes saying nothing. He could still feel her shaking. He couldn't understand why she slapped her hand over his. Did she like his touch...or need it? Because he felt the slow desire to require both. This nameless woman was starting to get under his skin and make him feel things he hadn't felt in his life. He could feel himself wavering on her pleading not to leave. He hated hearing that fear, that terror enter her beautiful voice. But he needed to do this. He would find the bastard who laid a hurtful hand on her.

  He didn't say anything, but waited patiently for her to say something in response to his question. After a few more minutes, she finally opened her eyes. "I think I walked around the cabin, feeling the railing until the steps appeared. I remember a hill...a big tree lying on its side, I think. I don't know where I saw these things, but they're jumbled in my small amount of memories I do have."

  "That's good. You did a good job. Now that wasn't so hard, or bad, was it, honey?" he said with a tender smile.

  "Not when you touch me. Your touch calms me. Your presence calms me. I don't want you to leave this cabin...or my eyesight. Please, Logan, please."

  He leaned in closer to her, a few inches from her lips, as he stared into her eyes. "I shouldn't like...to touch you, but I do. It calms me down as well. I'll try to be quick, but I have to go. You'll be in good hands with Kat."

  She responded by lowering her eyes to his lips. Any other response would've had him moving away from her, but instead she glanced down. That was his first complete undoing as he closed the distance and pressed his lips lightly to hers. Before he could have a chance to deepen it, a car door slammed to break his thoughts.

  Chapter 4

  "Got another small smear of blood over here," Derek said, pointing to the ground where a few leaves held a trace of her blood from her grueling escape.

  "Okay, back to the right. Damn, she was really weaving through these woods. I don't even know how she made it to my cabin with the way her feet looked. We're what...about a half mile away from my cabin?" Logan said, looking behind his shoulder in the direction his cabin sat.

  They had easily found a trail of blood, he assumed from her damaged feet, behind his cabin, and immediately started to track where they came from. About 500 feet away from the cabin, he saw a large tree lying on its side, guessing that's the tree she was talking about. Now he wanted to find the hill she mentioned. So far, nothing but stretches of trees, bushes, and flatland stared back at them.

  Derek nodded, his eyes still on the ground. "Yeah, I'd say that's a decent guess. Why didn't you call last night? That's not like you, Sheriff."

  Logan ran a hand over his face, sighing heavily. "I don't know, Derek. You should've seen her. When I first stumbled upon her, she fought me like I was attacking her. Once she calmed down, every time I mentioned a doctor, or calling anyone, she just freaked out. I figured waiting 'til the morning wouldn't hurt. She couldn't recall anything anyway and it was dark out. We wouldn't have been able to track decent. She was scared. I didn't want to increase the panic."

  "Yeah, I know what you mean. She didn't look too happy about you leaving. She looked scared...petrified even. I think she's a little attached to you already."

  Logan kept his eyes on the ground as they walked forward, dragging another hand over his face. "I know. She's just scared, Derek. She has no memory of who she is."

  Derek stopped walking, pointing to the ground. "Got more blood here. You didn't look too happy leaving her either."

  Logan glanced at him. "Are you going
somewhere with this conversation? Spit it out already, Derek."

  Derek shrugged and continued onward. "Just pointing out facts. I just think maybe you're a little soft on her. She's sorta pretty even with all the scratches covering her face. You soft on her, Sheriff?"

  "I'm just doing my job, Derek. Don't worry about me. I'm soft on everybody. You've never heard Charlotte call me a damn softie?" Logan said, turning his eyes back to the ground.

  "That's true, she does call you that. Where's she gonna stay, you know, until we figure out who she is?"

  "She can stay at the cabin. Do you honestly think she's going to go anywhere else right now? Like you pointed out, she didn't even want me to walk out."

  "True. She could always stay with Kat. You know, maybe spending some time with a woman will make her feel better."

  "Yeah, maybe." Logan ran another stressful hand over his face at the prospect of his mystery woman leaving. He suddenly didn't like that idea.

  "Well, hopefully we can figure out who she is by her fingerprints. If not by that, then maybe Charlotte can match her picture with missing persons. Someone's gotta have filed a report that she's missing. She did seem hesitant to let you take a picture and her fingerprints before we left."

  "Derek, she's scared. Imagine losing your memory and having no clue who the hell you are. You'd be scared. And I hope something pops up as well. Her family has to be worried...maybe she's even married," Logan replied, hating to voice that last part.

  "Yeah, maybe."

  "I need you to talk to Dr. Matthews for me. I don't want to leave her. You're right, she didn't like when I left. I don't want to stress her anymore than she already is. She can't even stand to hear the word doctor. I need to know why."

  Derek stopped in his tracks. "You think Dr. Matthews had something to do with this?"

  Logan shrugged. "Not really. Although, I didn't think Baxter would kill his daughter. Just talk to him, feel him out. Let me know what you think."

  "Gotcha. I'll talk to him today after we're done here."

  They kept walking another twenty minutes, in silence, to Logan's great relief. He didn't want to think about her being married, her leaving his cabin, her beautiful face in general. He needed his focus. But he hoped something popped up with her prints. It'd be the easiest way to identify her and send her back to her family, far, far away from his troubled thoughts. If nothing showed in the system, Charlotte would have a heap of work combing through missing person reports to match her picture. Definitely the easiest solution for everyone involved if her prints came back right away.

  "Looks like a hill to me," Derek said, pointing in front of them as they finally came across the hill she remembered.

  "Geez, when she said a hill, I was thinking something small. That's a pretty steep hill, and long," Logan said, shaking his head. His eyes caught a glimpse of gray. He took a few steps towards the bottom of the hill, reached down, and stood up holding a small patch of her white dress she had been wearing.

  "Damn! I think she might've rolled down this hill. This is from her dress. Probably why she was covered with leaves and scratches everywhere," Logan said, glancing up the steep hill.

  "Could explain how she lost her memory. Knocked her head while rolling. It's amazing she didn't kill herself rolling down this. What do you think...fifty feet high maybe?"

  "High enough to cause damage like it did. Let's climb," Logan said, grabbing a bag from his jacket pocket and tossed the rag into it, placing the bag back into his pocket. With the torturous thoughts of her rolling down this monstrosity, he started climbing.

  ***

  "Well, I have to admit, my brother did a decent job patching you up," Kat said, taking a seat on the small chaise lounge sitting to the left of the couch.

  "Yes, he was very gentle," she replied, as her fingers played with the blanket.

  Kat's hands had been as soft and gentle as Logan's had, but they hadn't made her tingle like his touch. She liked his touch much better. Kat had looked at her stomach; tenderly checking to make sure her ribs weren't broken by the bruising she had. Kat determined they weren't. Although, she had an intense feeling she needed x-rays to confirm, but that would never happen. Just the mere thought of stepping into a hospital made her break out in a sweat. Kat also took off the socks, washing her feet, reapplying the salve, and wrapping them with gauze instead.

  "Your vitals look good, your reflexes are good. You remember normal every day stuff, like what's in this cabin and what its function is. But when it comes to personal questions about you and your life, that's where you're drawing a blank. No memories whatsoever?" Kat asked, eyeing the delicate woman as she still fiddled with the blanket. Kat wanted to sigh with relief that the woman calmed down considerably since Logan left, but it had taken all her expertise to get her to agree to have an exam.

  "I had a nightmare last night," she whispered.

  "Okay. That's good. Or it could've been a memory. What happened?"

  "I was chained to a wall. He was hitting me. It was dark, no windows. That's it."

  "You don't remember anything important about this man."

  She shook her head no, quickly wiping a tear from her face.

  "That's okay. We'll figure this out. You're safe now. I don't think you have a serious head injury. Otherwise, even normal mundane stuff would be a blank for you. Obviously, you were held captive somewhere and your mind can't handle that. I think the stress of this whole situation is blocking your memories of who you are."

  She suddenly glanced over at Kat. "Really? What happens if I can never remember? What happens if it was something so horrible that I just never let go?"

  "You'll remember. I know it. You're safe here in Lucky…and with Logan."

  "You sound just as sure as Logan. Do you know that?" she said with the tip of her lip curling up slightly.

  "Well, he is my big brother. Learned a lot from him growing up. He's always so confident. I always admire his confidence, his forte in making decisions. That's why he makes such a great sheriff."

  "He does. I kicked him...when he first found me. I hurt him. I didn't mean to. I'm so sorry," she said suddenly, wiping another tear from her face.

  "Don't be. He's a tough guy. And I would've fought back too, if I were in your situation. You were just scared. Still are, a little. But hey, consider us friends now."

  At that, she gave Kat a wider smile. She was a lot like her brother. Even in her words. "Thank you, Kat."

  "I thought I heard my brother call you...honey. Is that what you want people to call you until you remember your name?" Kat said with a sly grin.

  "Oh, yeah. I'm still thinking of a name until we know my real one. Any ideas?" she said, looking down at her blanket again, fiddling harder with the end of it.

  "Hmm...no. Let me think about it. Do you like tea?" Kat said, standing up.

  "I don't know."

  "Well, let's find out," Kat said, giving her a wink and walked to the kitchen.

  As Kat prepared the tea, she sat on the couch looking around the room. She saw the chaise lounge, a cream color, looking soft and comfortable like the couch. Behind the chaise, the fireplace lingered with a small charred pile of wood and ashes. The simple look reminded her swiftly of Logan. When would he return? She really needed him to return.

  Bookshelves, one on each side of the fireplace, adorned the walls. On the bookshelves sat picture frames of Logan, and she assumed his family. Mixed in with the frames were books, magazines, and other various knickknacks that she figured held a special spot in Logan's heart. She glanced down at the floor, eyeing the blankets and the lone pillow Logan had used to sleep. Then she eyed the wooden floor, a beautiful auburn color that added a sweet essence to the cabin. Auburn? She continued to stare at the floor with a deep intensity until she heard Kat calling out to her.

  "Hey. A...honey...you alright?" Kat said, kneeling down in front of her, holding a cup of tea.

  She shook her head to clear her clouded mind. "I don't know what happened.
"

  "You were in a deep thought, that's for sure. Did you remember anything?"

  "No...no."

  Kat nodded and held her hand out. "Here you go. I hope you like tea."

  She grabbed the cup from her, taking a small sip, as Kat resumed her spot back on the lounge. "It's different."

  "Yeah, not everyone likes tea. I find it soothing myself. I'm more of a tea drinker than a coffee drinker."

  "Coffee? Now that sounds good."

  "Hmm...well, when we're done with tea, I'll make some coffee. I see the interest. Maybe you like coffee. See, you'll remember in no time. Let's think of a name, though. I felt weird calling you honey, but you weren't answering me," Kat said, piercing her lips in contemplation.

  "Okay. Fire away."

  "Me? Oh, geez. I have a twisted mind sometimes. You might not like my suggestions. Do you have any?" Kat asked with a laugh.

  "I don't know."

  "You say that a lot. Maybe I'll make an anagram out of it," Kat said laughing harder.

  "Well, when you don't know, you don't know," she said, laughing a little as well. "But I like that idea.

  Kat snapped her fingers. "I got it. It's not a lot of letters out of 'I don't know', but it's using three." Kat pointed at herself. "Kat." Then pointed at her. "Kit."

  She started laughing really hard at that point. "That is twisted."

  "I told you. But hey, we're friends now," Kat said as she chuckled. "Damn, I'm good."

  "Thanks for making me laugh."

  "You're welcome. Let's think of more. Let's see...Wondo...Doni...Wind...Ido...Woki...Kid..."

  She held up her hand. "I'm good with Kit...although, I sorta like Doni."

  "Yeah, we can go with Doni. Maybe your real name is close to that. Does it feel familiar?"

  "I don't know."

  Before she knew it, they were both giggling like crazy at her response.

  "Can we try something?" Kat asked, taking another sip of her tea.

  "Sure. What do you have in mind?"

  "I wanna spit a round of questions at you. The first thing that comes to mind, I just want you to say it."

  "Is this like a memory game or something?" Doni asked, playing with the cup in her hand.