Deserving You (A McCord Family Novel Book 3) Page 9

  He grew up in a loving environment. The only truly tragic thing that ever occurred was when Jimmy, Zane and Austin’s brother, died in the line of duty in New York City saving Ava’s life.

  “Look, Dare, I’m not going to lie. I like your sister, which you already know. Part of me is offering you a job because of her. Part of me is offering because of you. I don’t judge people, at least, I try not to. If you came to me, without me knowing Deja, and I saw you had a record, I’d still treat you fairly. I’m not sure how many other people would say that. Do you want a job or not?”

  Dare nodded to the coffee pot. “Help yourself. I’ll go change.” He walked out of the kitchen.

  Emmett poured a cup, draining the cup by the time Dare came back downstairs. He was wearing a plain black t-shirt with a pair of jeans.

  “This okay to wear?”

  “Yep. As long as you don’t care it gets dirty.”

  “Not really.”

  Dare locked the door and followed Emmett to his truck. “So am I gonna be mowing lawns and shit?”

  “Pretty much. Can you handle that?”

  “It doesn’t take much brains to mow a lawn,” Dare said with a laugh as he hopped into the passenger seat.

  Emmett chuckled and started the truck. “You’d be surprised. I can tell you some really funny stories.”

  “I’d like to hear them.”

  That sounded as if he was being sincere. Moments like this, he almost thought the two of them could be good friends. When Dare wasn’t sulking and thinking the worst about life, he was a decent guy.

  “Your brother Ethan is something else. He’s trying to hook me up with some women to…you know…hook up.”

  “Unless you give him the evil eye that you’ve mastered so well, he’ll have you hooked up in no time. He normally gets his way, because he’s a pest and doesn’t know how to back off.”

  A low rumble left Dare’s mouth as his lips curled into a smile. “Can’t say I’m offended by his pestering. It’s been a long time for me.”

  Grinning, Emmett shook his head and laughed. “You’ll be regretting those words when he won’t stop pestering you.”

  “Is that why you gave in so easily to ask out Deja? Are you going to do it?”

  Emmett shot a glance at Dare, surprised to see no anger or distrust on his face. Just indifference. Maybe a little wariness. “Do I have your blessing?”

  “Would you leave her alone if I said no?”

  He gave that question some thought. Serious thought. “No. I like your sister. There’s something about her. Before I met her, I had this impression of her. A woman with no morals, someone who had no respect. Then I met her. Her eyes…there was a pain hidden in the depths, and a ferocity that couldn’t be mistaken. She nearly knocked me on my ass from one simple look.”

  Dare was silent. Emmett glanced at him again. He was staring out the window as if he ignored every word Emmett just uttered. Talk about looking like a fool. Although his hands weren’t clenched like they normally were when they talked about Deja, he still appeared pissed by what he said. Emmett turned his attention back to the road.

  “Why haven’t you asked her out yet?”

  “Scared shitless. That about sums it up. She’s…she’s just unattainable.”

  “You seem to tackle everything head on. Yet, you’re scared to ask out my sister.” Dare chuckled as if it was the craziest thing he ever heard.

  “Honestly, I’m scared I’ll lose her altogether. I like the friendship we have. I don’t want to ruin that. If she turns me down, which she probably will, then I risk losing her even as a friend.”

  “I could tell you liked my sister right away.” Dare paused. Emmett glanced at him, knowing there was more he wanted to say.

  “And?”

  Dare met his stare, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “And my sister looks at you the same way you look at her. Ask her out, Emmett. You might get the answer you want.”

  ♡

  Deja slammed the front door closed, threw her purse on the little table near the closet, and headed for the kitchen. She almost wished she had some wine lingering in the house. But since Dare was released, she didn’t buy any kind of alcohol. She didn’t think it would be a good idea to have any around.

  He wasn’t drunk that deadly night, but she wasn’t positive if it would be healthy for him. He needed to get on the right path. Get a job. Insert himself back into society before he tasted a drop of alcohol. He had a drug problem back then. She didn’t want him to have a drinking problem now. Maybe it wouldn’t make sense to other people, but it made sense to her.

  Pulling open the fridge, the cool air tickled her skin, some of her hair standing on end. She grabbed the pitcher of iced tea and poured a glass.

  She hadn’t seen Emmett the entire day. Not in the morning. Not in the afternoon. He didn’t even stop in before the day ended. Talk about strange. He was always busy. If he wasn’t completing a job himself, then he oversaw one of his workers at a job site. No matter how busy he got, he stopped by the office. He didn’t need to. Part of her thought he did it just to see her. Which was bad of her to want or even think about. But she enjoyed seeing him, talking with him.

  It was a good thing he didn’t stop by. She shouldn’t torture herself so much.

  After downing the entire glass of tea, wishing it was wine instead, she poured herself another glass and opened the fridge to put the pitcher away.

  What should she make for supper? Last night’s dinner was ruined because of the fire. Thank goodness, it hadn’t turned out worse. It’d be great to try dinner again with Sophie and Austin. She wanted Dare to fit in with them, to make friends. Maybe it would help him see how life could be better if he just stopped shoving everyone away. Mostly her. It hurt just thinking about it.

  Shoving the fridge door shut, unsure of what to make, she realized it was way too quiet in the house.

  Where was Dare?

  She nearly dropped her glass of tea as she set it on the counter and raced for the stairs.

  Please. Tell me he didn’t leave without a word goodbye.

  Yesterday, when she got home from work, Dare had been lounging on the couch, channel surfing. It took her almost an hour of schmoozing to get him to agree to go over to Sophie’s for supper. He didn’t appear too happy to go with Emmett last night to the farm. When he got home, he barely uttered a word goodnight. She left the house this morning before he even woke up.

  She should’ve said goodbye. She should’ve said something to make him stay longer. The signs were all there that he would leave. That he didn’t care.

  Nearly tripping on a few stairs as she ran two at a time, she then halted to a stop in front of his closed bedroom door.

  “He didn’t leave. I have faith he didn’t leave.”

  Pep talk done, she grabbed the handle and turned it. She sank against the doorframe at the sight of his clothes scattered around the floor. Not even three full days out and he already managed to make a mess of his room. He never could keep a clean room. Not that their parents cared about much, but their mother always wanted them to keep their rooms cleaned. She still couldn’t figure out why. Maybe so it seemed like she cared when she really didn’t.

  She needed to take Dare shopping, or at least, give him money to buy new clothes. He was wearing clothes she had found at a few garage sales, stocking up his closet a little bit before he was released. She tried to get sizes she thought would fit, but without seeing him for ten years, she had no idea what his size was. The clothes he wore yesterday said she didn’t do too badly.

  His messy room gave her hope he hadn’t left her for good. So where was he?

  Walking back downstairs, taking the stairs at a snail’s pace, her thoughts tumbling in a million different directions, she almost tripped on the last step when a knock sounded on the door.

  The door swung open before she reached it. Emmett stepped through the threshold, his face a myriad of anger. What was he upset about?

  “Wh
at are you doing, E-man?”

  He whipped his hand toward the door. “I should ask you the same thing. What are you doing? Why isn’t the door locked? Austin’s really worried lately, and I wanted to make sure you were being safe. We can’t trust Kevin. You need to keep your doors locked.”

  Rolling her eyes, she bypassed him and shut the door, then flipped the lock. “Better?”

  A slow grin emerged. “Actually, it is.”

  She wasn’t sure what to make of the look on his face. Why was he staring at her like that? “Why are you here, Emmett?”

  “I needed to find out.”

  “Find out what?” Her brows dipped as the confusion took hold. She wanted to take a step back. A very big step. The look on his face—was that desire? No. She already flung herself at him once and he shoved her away. That’s all people liked to do to her. Push her away.

  Taking one large step, he was in her face, his mouth inches from hers. “Find out if you want me as much as I want you.” He cupped her cheeks and pressed his lips to hers.

  She couldn’t resist the softness of his lips or the gentleness in his touch. She moved closer, at the same time, wondering what the hell she was doing. He took her movement as acceptance and dropped his hands to wrap around her waist. She felt the heat of his arousal immediately. He wanted her. He wanted so much more than a kiss.

  It scared the hell out of her.

  She shifted her arms between their bodies and pushed him away. Despite the kiss being gentle and soft, they were breathing heavily, as if they had attacked each other with intense passion.

  “Why are you kissing me?”

  “Why did you kiss me the other night?” he countered.

  “I…it was a mistake.” She walked around him and took a seat on the couch.

  Where was a glass of wine when she needed it? Or better yet, a shot of whiskey. Something strong to drown out the hurt. The worry.

  The couch dipped as Emmett took a seat next to her. He grabbed her hand before she could move away. His touch was still gentle and soft.

  “I should’ve asked you a question before I kissed you. I couldn’t stop myself. I couldn’t get our last kiss out of my mind.”

  She yearned for him to pull her into his arms. She also yearned to yank her hand out of his. She wasn’t good enough for him. Why couldn’t he see that? Why did he kiss her? What did he want to ask?

  “What are you doing? We shouldn’t kiss. We shouldn’t—”

  His lips silenced her words. She enjoyed the subtle taste of mint that touched her lips from his. Did he pop in a mint before coming over? Was it his intention to kiss her no matter what?

  He slowly pulled away from her, his hand still locked around hers. “Can I take you to dinner?”

  Her mind was still enjoying his latest kiss. Until he spoke. “What?”

  “I’d like to take you to dinner.”

  “Why? Why are you kissing me?”

  “I’ll point out that you kissed me first. Now, I want to kiss you whenever I want, and I want to take you to dinner because I can. Because I like you…more than a friend.”

  His hand trembled within hers. He was nervous. She couldn’t believe it. Emmett didn’t get nervous. Sure, he said some silly crazy things at times, but that was just Emmett being, well, Emmett.

  “It’s not a good idea if we date, E-man. We shouldn’t.”

  “Why not? Give me one good reason why.”

  “Employee.” She pointed to herself. “Employer.” She poked him in the chest with her free hand.

  He grabbed that hand before she could pull it away. “There’s no office rule that says we can’t date. Try again.”

  “We’ll ruin a good friendship.”

  “Any great relationship starts out as good friends. Take Sophie and Austin, for example.” He grinned.

  She couldn’t help but smile back. It was all wrong. Why couldn’t he see that? Kissing him two days ago had been a moment of weakness. She had been dying to kiss him for ages and she used any excuse she could. But he pushed her away. Why was he doing this now?

  “We’re not compatible. We’re doomed to work out.”

  Laughing, he then snatched a kiss. She couldn’t help but lean toward him as he did.

  “Wrong. We fit together perfectly. We have tons in common. The most important thing is we’re both huge Twins fans. Doesn’t get more compatible than that. You can’t come up with a good reason.”

  She sighed and tried to extract her hands from his. He wouldn’t budge, although, she didn’t try too hard. “I don’t deserve a good man like you.”

  She whispered it so softly he had to lean closer to hear her words. She knew he heard, too, because his face became hard as stone. His eyes suddenly blazed with fire, not the color of desire either.

  “I wish you’d open up to me. I wish you’d tell me what would make you say something like that, let alone think it. You have no idea how beautiful you are, inside and out. You could have any man you want and picking me might seem like you’re settling. So maybe that says I don’t think I deserve you. But I want you. You have so much love and kindness to give and I want some of that.”

  “Emmett…”

  He drew her closer. She didn’t resist. His lips hovered next to hers as he whispered, “I love the sound of my name on your lips. Say you’ll go out with me. Let me take you to dinner.”

  “Dare needs me right now. I don’t think starting anything would be good. I don’t even know where he is. I should try to find him.”

  Surprisingly, he backed away. “He’s with Ethan.”

  “Why is my brother with your brother?”

  Emmett cracked a grin. “They bonded last night. Go figure. I dropped him off at Ethan’s after work when Ethan called and they decided to get a drink. Meet women or something like that.”

  “After work? Women? What’s going on?” This time she managed to yank her hands out of his and stood up. She took a few steps away from the couch, needing some distance.

  Emmett slowly stood up. “He’s not a bad guy once the orneriness wears off. I offered him a job and he accepted. Worked his ass off today, too. Ethan, for whatever reason, is determined to find him a woman and…you know…yeah.” He glanced away, almost embarrassed by what he said.

  Deja shoved her hands to her hips. Oh, she knew. “To have sex. Did you think this dinner invitation would go much smoother if you gave my brother a job? What kind of sick game are you playing? I refuse to be made fun of and look like a fool.”

  She stalked over to him and poked him hard in the chest. Her finger almost hurt from it. Emmett worked hard during the day and his body showed the signs. She could just imagine the hard ridges and plains of his chest that hid beneath his shirt. She poked him again just to feel it once more. Oh, what she’d give to run her hands up and down his chest.

  No. He was obviously playing her for a fool. She wouldn’t allow it.

  “You can take your kisses and date and shove it where the sun don’t shine, E-man. I don’t want you and never will.”

  He snatched her hand that kept poking his chest and rubbed his thumb over the top, soothing her anger somewhat. “Your body says otherwise. What are you afraid of? You wanted me a few days ago. You were willing to go further than a kiss.”

  She brought her body next to his and almost purred with contentment. “You’re right. You want me, E-man. Then take me.”

  He dropped her hand and stepped away. “I hate it when you talk like that. I want you, damn it, but not like that. I won’t let you use sex as a shield.”

  Crisis averted. She knew that exact reaction would occur if she acted like that. “I won’t let you make me look like a fool.” Her face went rigid as she jerked her hand toward the front door. “Get the hell out.”

  He hesitated, his features displaying how torturous a decision it was for him. Would he leave? He’d better, or she might give in to her desires. She might actually take his offer of more than friendship. Even knowing he was playing her. What
would it be like to go further than a kiss with Emmett? She wanted to know.

  But she had pride. She had respect for herself. She wouldn’t bow down to any man in that way. If he didn’t simply like her for her, she wouldn’t give in.

  “I offered your brother a job because it was the right thing to do, not because you’d sleep with me. Why can’t you see my true feelings? I…forget it. If that’s your opinion of me, that I would do something so despicable, then that’s on you.”

  He turned around and left. No hesitation in his steps. No jerky movements as he unlocked the door. Just utter calmness.

  Perhaps he did care for her. Maybe she blew everything out of proportion. It was hard to think any man, or any person, would want her simply for her. She had yet to meet one person who treated her that way.

  Except Emmett.

  Shit!

  Sinking down onto the couch, tears soaked her face as she realized what she just did. She shoved away the best man to ever step into her life. Why?

  Because she was scared. Because the thought he’d want someone like her seemed ludicrous.

  If it wasn’t prominent before. It was now.

  She didn’t deserve him.

  Chapter 9

  Emmett let the brisk air wash over his skin before he pulled open the door to Chico’s Bar and Grill. He should’ve headed home. To his empty house. To the loneliness. To the quiet. To lick his wounds and wish the night hadn’t turned out the way it did.

  Instead, he headed to where his brother Ethan and Dare were hanging out. More punishment. What would Dare say about Deja turning him down? Probably nothing good.

  He was starting to realize, and picture, just what kind of childhood Deja had. She didn’t know love when she saw it.

  Love?

  He froze at the bar as the word flowed around his mind. Is that what he was feeling? Is that why he kept torturing himself? Is that why he put himself out there tonight, saying the things he did, because he loved Deja?